Gray Hair -- Do I Care?
Let me preface this post by saying that I've never been much of a girly girl. I don't have sisters, and I don't have daughters. I'm low-maintenance; rarely wear much makeup; have never gone for a mani-pedi; spend much of my life in jeans and yoga pants... And, I've always dyed my hair at home.
But. I found my first gray hair at 16 and have been dying my hair regularly since my late 20s (generally some shade of dark red or auburn). After 20 years of this, I find myself both tired of the whole process and curious as to how gray I actually am at this point! So I've been letting the gray grow out for a couple of months now to see how it looks, on the assumption that if it's too terrible, I can always dye it back, right?
My hair is now apparently pretty liberally peppered with gray, especially near the front by the temples. (If I were a man, I'd be super distinguished! lol.) It's pretty hard to take pictures of your own hair (try it sometime), but you can see what I have going on here right now.
Anyone here take the plunge and let their hair go gray?
If you've ever let your hair go gray I'd love to hear about your experience, because I'm vacillating here between really liking how it's growing out, and really thinking I should dye it again. My hair isn't that long right now, but would still probably take about a year to completely grow out in a less than graceful process -- then again, I do work from home, and we have a pretty laid back lifestyle.
I'm not in my 20s any more, and have earned every single one of these gray hairs. 🙂 Honestly? I don't mind the gray as much as I thought I would, but also like the dark reddish brown color I've been using more than my natural (dark brown, where it's not gray yet) hair color. Another consideration is that gray hair is more prone to frizz, which is already a problem; mine is always a bit calmer for a while after it's freshly dyed.
MashupDad says he doesn't mind either way, but he's a smart man and this is probably the hair equivalent asking "do I look fat?"
Watch this!
Speaking of gray hair: Have you see this viral video from The Stay At Home Chef? Do watch, and read her post.
Dude, you're killing me here; I'll buy the damned hair color for you even without a coupon (I know, I know, you can buy your own)!
Or maybe you're going for the automatic senior discount when shopping?
You know I am biased, but I don't think it necessarily makes one look older! I get compliments and encouragement all the time - possibly people are trying to be nice, but I don't think that is all. I think silver hair is a bold style choice, and a lot more interesting than brown hair with varying degrees of obvious roots (mine is only solid for a week or two since I have so much very light gray). And growing it out (with the assistance of a bleaching by a professional) is the most exciting personal style decision I have made in a long time. I haven't done anything to it since the bleaching 4 months ago and I probably have about 2.5 inches of natural hair, so it will probably be another year and a few cuts to get it 100%. As far as the frizziness, it is maybe a little worse, but I still have to do the stuff I always did to tame it, so it doesn't really affect anything. I do think it holds being straightened or curled better in is current state, for what it's worth.
I think it's entirely up to how you feel when you look in the mirror. I frosted my med. dull brown hair for about 20 years until it was a waste of time because of the gray. Then I tried dying it, which was a mess and the gray roots grossed me out, so, I just let it go. Even the blonde dye showed roots on me and i have what I was told was resistant gray because it never really all took the dye. I'm very comfortable being gray for the last 20 years, but, I know not everyone is. Let it go and use the wash out type of dye if you want to go gracefully, and at any time you can go back to coloring it. I did like the texture of my hair better when I bleached it, but, my gray is not much different then I remember my not dyed hair was. Good Luck!
Girl I have an appt Thursday for color. I have a ton and hate it. I dont have a problem being 50 but i do have a problem with my greys . Plus score that I have a 20% text coupon from the salon I go yo. Lol but I'll go anyway.
Love it and leave it be! I am in my early 40s and get excited when I find a grey hair! I love how your hair looks! I long for the day when my hair gets gray! It is sad that society looks down on gray hair and anything that makes us old! Old is somebody who lacks the desire to do something with their life. Gray hair, laugh lines and more are signs of a life lived. They should not be ignored.
I can't stand my grey hair. I just dyed it myself today. Mine was getting bad and I will be 43 on 17th and people cant believe I have a 20 year old but i do.
From what I can see, you'll be awesome with the salt & pepper look! Especially with the straighter look. I've dyed mine since my forties, but less and less. My gray was like "Spot the dog." A spot of black, a patch of white, another spot of black--scattered randomly over my head. I Think I'm ready to say the heck with it.
Rachel's mom
I'm like you. Been dying my hair since my 20's. I get to a point of two many when I give up and say that's it, time to she. I just can't stand it! I already feel old at 53 but I at least want to feel some youth left in me lol!
I agree. I'm at the point in my life where, hummm, I don't really care what other people think. I've been fighting this battle since I was 18. Now at 52, respectively, I'm thinking about just letting it go. I'm confident within myself to make peace with it. And, my hubby loves older women anyway, lol ? You do you ?
Rachel: I think your hair looks nice with a little gray. I’ve never dyed my hair, and I will be 60 next year. My family has a history of premature gray (my mother and grandmother were both almost completely gray before the age of 30, and they had beautiful white hair in their later years), so I sort of thought I wanted to honor that heritage and not dye my hair. My hair has grayed more slowly (starting more significantly in my 40s and 50s). It still has quite a bit of brown in front (the natural color is sort of light brown/dishwater blonde, lighter than your hair), but the back is mostly gray and I actually like the way it’s come in with almost a frosted look. If you let your hair go gray, you will look older. In our youth-obsessed society, people will see the gray and judge you to be older than you are (just wait until you start being offered senior discounts at the movie theatre before you are old enough to qualify by teenagers who think anyone over 30 or 40 is “old”). My husband (who is only a year older than me) is almost completely gray (starting to look white) and people think he is much older than he is. I think that some women who dye their hair start to look a little fake if the coloring is off, so that is something to watch out for if you continue to color your hair. Do whatever makes you feel good about yourself, and if you aren’t ready to go gray now you can revisit the idea at a later time, but I think going gray is OK and wish that more women would do it. Many women look very striking with gray or white hair.
My hair is just like yours Rachel, a little unruly. I have been growing out the color now for two years. My hair is almost down to my waist. I'm back and forth with cutting it and donating it. I'm very low maintenance also, so I have to go long or very short. I have only colored my hair a few times because of the gray, and noticed when I was coloring it, a bunch of hair would fall out for a few weeks after coloring. I started to think, if my hair is falling out like this, it must not be too good to dye your hair. I love my grays, and like you, feel like I earned each and every one of them. I think it looks great on you!
When I first saw the top of the picture, before scrolling down, I thought it was a picture of the new gray kitten! It was "Caturday" after all! LOL But seriously now, I am older and more gray than you are and have been down this road a million times.....well hundreds? I did hair for over 25 years and have colored my hair along with many, many customers and it is a nightmare to keep up with! Those color customers were my "bread & butter" too, so I kind of love gray hair and yet hate my own at the same time. I used to use only professional products until I stopped working and in the last 10 years for the first time in my life used store brands, which I am willing to experiment with now since it's just on me and I don't have to be as presentable day to day for "work". I know a few things about gray hair. It is resistant, course, and like a wire at times! I have done mine too dark and too light, too brassy and too flat/drab. I have long hair now and I am tempted to get it all cut off and start over since it's a chore to try to apply the color to now. My hair is thick as well. I would let yours grow out until you cannot stand it....since you have already gone this far! You still have plenty dark hair left and I think you may even like it natural. Color makes your hairs cuticle damaged and if you stop using the chemicals you may like the texture? Good luck with your hair, either way you decide, my professional opinion is "It's only hair and it will grow back!" Be happy with what God gave you, some people have more serious problems! :>)
Like you - I dyed it for 30 years, and by that time I was ready to get my freedom back. I have beautiful gray hair, and with a cute hairstyle, I'm loving life. Bring on the years!
At 61, I am no longer trying to look young anymore. I stopped coloring my gray a few years ago and never looked back.
Personally, I like the gray on you. As others have noted, dyed hair looks really fake if you don't get the color just right. And that's really sad once you are 50+, because it looks like you are trying too hard.
But, that's just me. Do whatever feels right for you.
Hey all -- I meant to answer some of these before, but the crazy back-to-school week got away from me! Thanks so much for all the input, because I really am going back and forth about this -- a week later, though, and I'm still letting it go. We'll see!
@Trish -- Your hair is so elegant the gradual way you're doing it! Love it.
@Mandy -- I thought about trying the wash-out dye to do this more gracefully, but have never had much luck with that and my resistant grays -- they tend to go more orange than anything else, which, yikes. 🙂
@Mom -- You can do it! 😉
@Jane -- Thanks! We'll see, it's too early to tell the texture yet. But that's what I figure: I've had haircuts that look worse than this does growing out, lol.
I think one way to tell if you should let go is when your boxed hair color from the drug store stops holding on to your hair. I’m facing that now and being 64 and retired, I think I’m going to go to a colorist and help my hair along. I wear my hair short and have for years and love the cut. I’ve been coloring since I was in my late 20’s and I’m tired of it too. Good luck.